Apologies to everybody i call family

Hey,
I apologise,
                  for being a victim when I could've spoken out.
                  for not standing up to what I believed for the fear of being laughed at.
                  for being the bully: it tasted good.
                  for pretending like I did not understand your pain because it sucked being in that state.
                  for trying to level according to my peers knowing you gave me everything you could and still asked for more.
                  for despising you of being yourself.
                  for disliking everything I owned.
                  for wanting more.
                  for laughing at you.
                  for ill-talking because it sounded cool.
                  for crying and complaining.
                  for blaming you for all my mistakes: it was the easiest way out.
                  for mentally seeking revenge.
                  for wanting you to never get over me.
                  for never wanting to open up but wanting you to understand.
                  for being a total jerk.
                  for knowing all your weaknesses and still using a knife to poke you.
                  for just every wrong move I took intentionally but unintentionally.
                  for being selfish but I knew the only way then.
                  for trying to fit in when I had to only fit in my skin.

and Thank You.

Love always,